


The further adventures of Barbara Minerva

by Bacner



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, DCU (Comics), Justice League (2017), Justice League - All Media Types, Wonder Woman (Movies - Jenkins), Wonder Woman - All Media Types
Genre: DC comics - Freeform, F/M, Gen, Icerberg lounge, Joker is his own warning, Kobra Cult (DC comics), Magic, Muskox, Older woman younger man, Other tags to be added, Snakes, Weasel - Freeform, alternate universe - post-movies, atypical friendship, friends frenemies and enemies, there're some unicorns left over after the wishes ran amok, white-tailed deer
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:49:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28391181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bacner/pseuds/Bacner
Summary: What happened to Minerva after WW84 film ended. Will she find friendship and a new reason to live? Will she find her very own unicorn? What else she will find? Read on and find out!
Comments: 9
Kudos: 9





	1. How the Cheetah met the Flash

**Author's Note:**

  * For [cedes_92150](https://archiveofourown.org/users/cedes_92150/gifts), [joli_camarillo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/joli_camarillo/gifts), [dirtydiana139](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dirtydiana139/gifts), [lila_luscious1](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lila_luscious1/gifts), [Patty_Parker60](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Patty_Parker60/gifts).



> Disclaimer: I don't own anyone.

…Something was scaring the deer in the woods.

Normally, you would not expect the Flash of all people to care about that, but Flash rather did. The fastest man alive loved to race, (no duh), and while there was no man or woman who could challenge him, (Superman did not count, because of Justice League reasons, really), the deer rather did.

Oh, sure, in a straight-up race the Flash could defeat any ordinary animal, whether it was a deer or an antelope, but with their zigging, and zagging, and the harsh forest terrain, the deer actually gave the Flash a challenge the way that no human racers could, and this mattered to the Scarlet Speedster – and right now something was scaring the deer, and not in a normal way.

There was little that the Flash could do a mountain lion or a grizzly bear, (if the predators did not act like outright arses to his face), but right now, he was not dealing with either of them, (or any-thing else that was mundane, like a wolverine)… he just did not know what. That state of affairs was simply frustrating.

“HMM,” the Black Racer said as he thought over the Scarlet Speedster’s frustrations, honest, and made a sound by knocking on a tree. Immediately the Flash whirled around. 

Nothing, no one… wait. Was that a spotted tail hanging from a tree? The Flash looked up, and saw…a blonde-haired person of the female gender who was eyeing him with clear amusement. There was no evident tail, as far as he could see now, (and where did it go?), but the woman’s clothing in-dicated that she wasn’t any ordinary hiker either, so the Flash approached her tree and called-out: “Hello!”

The woman effortlessly leapt down the tree, ignoring her bare feet. (A couple of sandals were located behind the tree, the Flash could see them now), and said, without any fear, (but then again, the Flash was the least intimidating member of the Justice League for a reason), “Hello to you too. And you are who?”

“I’m the Flash, the fastest man alive!” the Flash said grandly, doing his best to ignore the sceptical grimace on the woman’s face – it rather reminded him of Diana’s scepticism, for some reason. “And you are?”

“Isn’t it Superman, who’s the fastest man-?” the other person was not convinced yet. “Oh, and I’m Barbara Minerva. What’s your civilian name?”

“Actually, Superman is merely smarter- I mean, faster than a speeding bullet,” the Flash said cheerfully. “I’m much faster than that! Moreover, what do you mean, a civilian name? Are you a friend of the Justice League?”

“Oh my, no!” the woman rolled her eyes behind her glasses. “I’m the Cheetah-“

“Diana told us about you-“

The woman shifted her poise and facial features slightly-

“I’m Barry Allan, the Flash,” the man in question said quickly, aware that he had said something wrong, he just did not know what. (He often did that sort of thing with women). “Do you know what is scaring the deer around those parts?”

“Hm,” the woman said thoughtfully, as she casually draped one of her arms around the Flash’s shoulders. Given their respective heights and ages, the Flash suspected that she was messing with him. “I admit I don’t know what to think of you, Flash. On one hand, you’re a friend of Diana’s, and as such, you’re no friend of mine…on the other, you seem to be a good young man…” she taped her face, briefly revealing teeth that didn’t look quite human, before snapping her fingers. “Idea! Come hither, my pet!” she yelled loudly.

With a clanking of hooves, some sort of an animal emerged from the woods before them. In general outline, it resembled a deer, (rather than a horse, for comparison), and it was covered in pale brown fur, (again like some deer) – but it was no deer, for in place of a deer’s antlers there was a single horn. 

The Flash didn’t believe in unicorns, honest, but this beast’s horn was something else – it wasn’t an undivided horn as expected from a unicorn, but rather an interwoven mess of branches, or antlers, complete with tiny holes in them.

A breeze blew. Some sort of music began to emanate from the holes – a very lovely music. “Can I touch it?” the Flash muttered, as he gingerly moved forwards to touch the newcomer.

The music abruptly stopped, as the animal’s lips curled backwards, revealing something much more omnivorous than a mere deer or a horse-

“Sure” Barbara Minerva said cheerfully, as she grabbed the Flash by the scruff of his suit and flung him into the air. “If you can last a ride upon it, you can touch my pet!”

The Flash came down hard upon the beast’s back and grabbed it with both his hands and feet, doing his best to hang on tight, just as it went off like a shot. Considering that he managed to land backwards upon the animal’s back and grab its’ rather short and deer-like tail, he was up a bumpy ride.

“That idiot!” Minerva facepalmed, dropped on all fours, and chased after them.

“NOW THIS IS FUN!” the Black Racer commented as he followed them.

Someone else, supposedly unseen, followed him. The Black Racer pretended not to notice.

/ / /

_Some time later…_

The Flash’s crazy new ride took him onto a- scenic tour of the nature reserve, over fields and ravines, up the mountains and down the forests, doing its’ best to dislodge him, but the Flash somehow managed to hang-on. He did not know why, he did not know how, but he was able to hang on onto his steed.

His new companion, incidentally, was also here, shadowing them – sometimes she seemed to be a human, but running on all fours in a way that no ordinary human could, sometimes much more feline, but always fast. Very fast. Not as fast as the Flash himself, of course, but still fast.

And sometimes… but then an actual unicorn emerged from the trees – creamy white in color, with a spiralling, shimmering horn. Upon seeing it, the Flash’s steed immediately stopped and emitted a series of rather deer-like cries. The newcomer neighed back and wagged its’ tail – its’ long, horse-like tail.

Immediately, the Flash’s steed cried-

“Yes, this isn’t a part of the deal,” Barbara Minerva agreed, as she stood next to them and pulled the Flash down to the ground. “Go, and enjoy yourself.”

Immediately, the two horned beasts were off like a shot, vanishing in the trees.

“AW!” the Black Racer said, but did nothing, because the Flash spoke next:

“So, lady, you do those rides on a regular basis? This explains the great ass and thighs!” he jabbed his finger at the Cheetah’s abs to emphasize his point, (unintentionally).

“Young man,” the woman in question shot him a glare, “You’re closer in age to my godson than to me! Behave yourself!”

“You have a godson? Cool! What’s his name?” the Flash did not back down. “What is your story, anyhow? Want to go to the local food place and talk?”

The Cheetah shot him another look. “Well, aren’t you fast,” was all that she said.

“Yes, well, this is going to be the beginning of a weird new friendship-“

Barbara’s tail twitched and wagged at the word of ‘friendship’ despite her conscious intents, (whatever they were to begin with)… “Right,” she said brightly. “You like hot dogs?”

The Flash just laughed in reply, and the mismatched, (but speedy), duo left.

“…Aw!” said the Deer woman, as she emerged from behind the shrubs (still in her Golden hind shape). “And I had plans for him!”

“REALLY?” the Black Racer asked conversationally, stopping pretending not to notice her. “DO GO ON.”

The Deer woman gulped and tried to flee. Effortlessly, the Black Racer caught up with her, flung her onto one shoulder, pulled his scythe onto the other, and they were gone.

End


	2. Of the Kobra cult

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a brief ficlet starring the Cheetah and her godson.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I still don't own anyone.

…Things weren’t going according to the plan, not exactly, Maxwell Lord IV (the Fourth), son of the Maxwell Lord III (the Wishmaster), thought, as the Justice League invaded Kobra Cult’s cur-rent HQ – not the real HQ, but the one in which he was currently located, and the one from which he should’ve gone away already, but – his godmother was here.

“Godson,” Barbara Minerva leaned across the desk, looking him straight in the eye. “Words can-not begin to describe as to how, just how, disappointed I am! Here I am, trying to live up to the promise I made to your father back in the 90s regarding you, and here you are, doing your best to make it impossible!”

She slammed her fist onto Maxwell’s desk. It held, but a secret panel opened in the ceiling, and Batman fell down from it. He landed on the desk feet first…but not before one of Barbara’s arms shot out and grabbed him by the throat.

There was a reason – several reasons – as to why the Caped Crusader was one of the top members of the Justice League, including the fact that he had an armor that allowed him to fight Superman on an equal footing at least for a while, but the fact is that like all of the cats, especially the big ones, once Barbara Minerva got a good grip on anything or anyone, she was almost impossible to shake off…unless you were Diana Prince the Wonder Woman, in which case all bets were off, but here and now? There was no Wonder Woman, there was only Batman, and he was having problems.

“As I was saying,” Barbara Minerva continued, “here I am, giving you this nice little international crime syndicate, hoping that you would cure it off their aspirations to become a terrorist organi-zation of some sort, and what do you? Turn them halfway into some sort of a religious fanatical cult, of snake worshippers, no less! Why snakes, I ask you? I mean, I am grateful that you did not use cat DNA to transform those pour sods down in the basement, but still, human-snake hy-brids. Really?”

“Of course not!” the IV protested ardently, now that he had a chance to put a word in edgewise – these days, when Barbara Minerva went on a rant, she really went on a rant. “Technically, they aren’t human-snake hybrids; they’re more of snake-human hybrids, snakes with a bunch of other DNA in them instead. No cats, too,” he added quickly, trying to read his godmother’s face and failing.

“Really?” Barbara Minerva grabbed her godson by his collar and took a deep sniff. “Hah. You smell of truth. Excellent! This is a completely different matter!”

“It is?” the IV blinked.

“Absolutely! Who the kriff cares about snakes, other DNA or otherwise?” the Cheetah proclaimed, as she slung her godson over her should to get away from the Justice League, while flinging Batman away. 

…The original trajectory would have taken Batman into a wall across the room, and a collision with it would have caused him some pain and trauma at least. However, the Black Racer was rac-ing by, and so he swung his scythe and slightly nudged Batman, altering his trajectory, and caus-ing him to fall into the open doorway, right into the Flash. An ordinary man would have been bowled off his feet, Superman wouldn’t have even flinched, (but at that speed Batman would actually prefer to hit a wall rather than the Man of Steel), and the Scarlet Speedster? He easily caught the Batman and took him to (relative) safety. “Your hero,” he said wryly as the two of them stopped running, (well, the Flash did, but this was neither here nor there).

“Shut up,” Batman grunted, (his throat was still sore from the Cheetah’s grip), as he conveyed the information about the mutants in Kobra Cult’s secret basement to Clark and Diana, suggesting that they should stop pulling their punches. Genetically modified humans, (driven to potential insanity by the operations), was one thing, genetically modified snakes were another – and sure enough, before long, it was over.

The Cheetah and her godson had escaped for the moment, though, but that was another story.

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes:
> 
> This is the son of the Maxwell from the WW84 movie, who is currently dead, (from the natural causes), in this story, (for the moment), i.e., the boy who allowed Diana to get to the movie Maxwell and save the world, (in a matter of speaking).
> 
> The Kobra cult had dominated Cheetah, (in one of her versions), for a while in the DC comics' canon.
> 
> Minerva is still single, (though she still falls in love on a regular basis as she did in the movie canon, apparently), and has kept her supernaturally long life and other perks from her run-in with the Dreamstone, (unlike Lord, who passed them onto his son instead, in the story that I may yet write).


	3. The Barbara and Diana show (part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Diana re-meets Barbara in the early 1990s. Things don't go according to plan for everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: everyone is owned by DC franchise here.

When Diana approached Barbara for the first time in the (early) 1990s, the blonde-haired woman was sitting on her toilet, examining her female hygiene products – not the most glamorous of restarts, to be frank.

“Minerva,” Diana told sternly her friend turned enemy…sort of. “What are you up to?”

“I’m sitting on my white porcelain throne, trying to decide which brand of pad is the best for me,” the other woman replied. “What does it look like?”

“…I mean, what are you up to with Circe?” Wonder Woman repeated her question, realizing that she walked into this one by herself.

“Nothing,” Minerva shook her head as she raised her hygiene products to her eye level – for some reason she was back to wearing glasses now. “Which brand do you think is the best for me – for the last few months my monthly visitor was all over the place, and it is driving me insane-“

Diana sighed, rolled her eyes, grabbed the products’ packages, examined them, chose one, grabbed Minerva by her scruff, (metaphorically speaking – right now the other woman looked more human than not), put her on the table, and quickly set her up down below, as she had helped her Amazon sisters back on Themiscyra on a regular basis back in the past. 

(Yes, the Amazons had had their monthly visits, since they were mostly human than not, on one hand, and they had their own products to deal with them, because they were not that idealistic, thank you very much). 

“Better?” she curtly asked the other woman.

Instead of replying straightaway, Barbara stood up, shook herself all over, especially her arse, straightened her skirt, shook herself all over and faced Diana again.

“You really need more women in your Justice League, Wonder Woman, or is there something going on between you and Bruce Wayne that I am not aware off?”

“…Where did you get the idea that there’s something between him and me?” Diana blinked. “Come to think of it, how did you get to him from Justice League?”

“I’ve met him in the past and I know that he’s actually Superman,” Barbara said airily, then blinked as her interlocutrix stared at her with an open mouth. “Diana, you okay?”

“No,” Wonder Woman managed to get her coughing under control. “Not entirely. Barbara, getting back to you-“

“You’re no fun,” Cheetah said petulantly, thrusting her lower lip forwards in an obviously fake attempt to be cute. “But to answer your question, there is no ‘Me and Circe’ – we’re on speaking terms, yes, and have broken a bottle of wine or two recently on an irregular basis – but nothing more. What’s the sudden interest in her?”

“She has been all over D.C., turning people into animals-“

“No, she has teamed-up with Luthor and Ra’s, and has been busy turning animals into politicians instead,” the other woman shook her head. “You know – senators, members of the Congress, etc., etc., - that sort of thing. I got nothing against her, but I’m staying out of this one – it just feels wrong to me for the obvious reasons.”

“She’s been turning animals into people instead?” Diana involuntarily raised her voice.

“She’s been turning animals into politicians!” Barbara snapped back. “There’s a difference! You cannot turn an animal into a person properly because of the divine laws, and the evolutionary scale, and what else have you! An animal into a politician, however, is easy-peasy; because it is a sideways move, rather than a properly ascending one, see?”

“And you aren’t a part of this?” Diana refused to be distracted.

“No,” Minerva shook her head. “I’m not. Ra’s is, because he hates the U.S. for whatever reasons – personally, I think that the Lazarus pits are beginning to affect his mind – and Luthor is only interested in Superman, so he isn’t entirely sane too, and the original D.C. politicians – hey, they’re politicians, not people, so there isn’t too much difference between them and the newcomers-“

“Minerva, you’re wrong,” Diana shook her head. “D.C. does have its’ good people – Jeffrey Mace, for example…”

An odd look briefly flashed over the other woman’s bespectacled face – so brief, that Diana wondered if she had not imagined it when she said Jeffrey Mace’s name. But she did not. 

“Yes, I guess you showed me,” the other woman said instead of any elaboration on her political rant. “Anything else?”

“Barbara,” Diana said quietly. “This doesn’t have to be this way-“

“Hi!” A much younger girl with dark curly hair ran into the room. “I’m Zatanna, and you’re Wonder Woman! Wow!”

Diana blinked and stared at Minerva.

“This is Zatanna,” Barbara reluctantly elaborated. “I’m babysitting her-“

“Auntie Barbara-“

“Fine, I’m hosting her while she’s practicing her magic,” Barbara rolled her eyes, “and her father is busy doing his own business.”

“Magic? Young lady, are you a magician?” Diana blinked as she leaned down to look at the newcomer.

“Yup-yup! But I’m still learning!” Zatanna said excitedly, as she took off the magician’s top hat that she had been wearing previously, and put it onto Diana instead.

There was a pause.

“She can’t get it off, can she?” Barbara asked wryly, when it became obvious that the chapeau in question seemed to have swallowed Diana’s head completely and started to slide further down.

“No,” Zatanna said carefully from behind Barbara. “Uh, Auntie Barbara? I, um, do not think that I can fix that, we need to call daddy-“

“I hear you,” Barbara sighed and took her phone. She dialled a number, (with only some reluctance). 

“Yes?” Circe spoke on the other end.

“Can you send Giovanni over? Hs daughter put on his hat over your archnemesis-“

“Excuse me,” and Circe was abruptly in the room as well.

“Hey. Where’s daddy?” Zatanna asked quietly, as she hugged Minerva’s legs tightly.

For her part Minerva seemed to be observing Circe and her antics with some sort of placid curiosity…only her face no longer looked fully human…or entirely bemused…

“Relax, your daddy is currently running some errands behind my back – he’s just lucky that I’m tacitly approving of them,” Circe said dismissively…before she saw the still incapacitated Diana – and burst into laughter. “Ok, this is so worth my time, and yes, we’re so getting it off her,” she told the others, “but first – photos! And a disco ball!” she laughed.

“I don’t like her,” Zatanna muttered into Barbara’s hair. “I’m sorry-“

“That’s because you’re not evil,” Barbara muttered back. “I hear you.”

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: So, in the 'Justice League Dark' comics, Zatanna's dad had been on speaking terms with Circe at least, and this is what I'm going for here. Circe is still eviller than Cheetah is, though.


	4. Cheetah vs. the Justice League - round 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: DC still owns everyone.

…Cheetah was in the muskox enclosure.

Well, actually, she was over the muskox enclosure, sitting on one of the pillars that were looming over the top of the fence, dangling her toes into the muskoxen muzzles. The latter stood in a defensive circle, making worried sounds, but for the moment the supervillain, (cough), was in no hurry to attack the animals, preferring to tease them instead, apparently.

“Cheetah, I would like for you to surrender peacefully,” Superman told sternly the metahuman in question, even as he floated down in front of her. He sounded cross, and justifiably so, since he arrived on the scene so quickly was because he had been on the scene already, as Clark Kent, on a date with Lois Lane, and Cheetah had quite ruined it with her mischief. 

The scientist turned almost a real-life Jellicle cat shifted to look at the Man of Steel. “Bruce Wayne, as long as I live!” she whistled appreciatively. “It really is you!”

There was a reasonably awkward pause. “No, I am not,” Superman replied brightly, aware that Batman was listening in on this conversation already. So was Wonder Woman, for that matter, but she was a different story. “I don’t know where you got that idea-“ he paused, frowned, and seemingly changed the topic abruptly: “Say, did you have a red-haired phase in your life?”

“Yes!” Cheetah replied, sounding quite pleased with herself. “I see that you remember me-“

“Yes, but I’m not Bruce Wayne – back then I impersonated him for a reason, and anyhow, this isn’t the point,” Superman told her sternly. “Cheetah, stop harassing the animals and surrender!”

“Yes! What he said,” the Flash cheerfully agreed with the older man as he arrived on the scene, (he took the scenic route because of personal reasons). “How’re your unicorns doing, anyhow?”

“Just fine, thank you,” Minerva smiled, revealing a mouthful of not-quite-human teeth in a surprisingly human smile. “Why does Superman’s date have a moustache that is hairier than mine is on a bad day?” she asked, as she sharpened her claws on one of the pillars in the muskoxen en-closure. The claws dug-in long and deep, sending sprays of splinters into the air.

“I do not have a moustache!” Lois snapped as she whirled around, looking for support – after seeing Cheetah’s claws in action, she was keeping her distance, Justice League or not. “Flash, tell her-“

“Superman used to be Henry Cavill’s stunt double in the latter’s recent film,” Batman commented from his position before the Flash could, “and apparently he did well, and he was very impressed by Henry’s moustache, because it was a cowboy movie, or something like that. So, after a few misunderstandings Lois decided to grow her own-“

Superman twitched – apparently, Batman was more upset about him shanghaiing Batman’s yacht, (cough), back in the 90s and impersonating him at that time as well. 

Lois Lane was even less amused. “You know,” she whirled onto the Caped Crusader, when even more new people appeared on the scene. 

“Hey there Big Cat,” a blonde-haired woman in a catsuit that was not Barbara Minerva said shyly as she thrust a bundle of weaponry to the Cheetah/Barbara Minerva. 

“Right back at you, Little Cat,” the latter smiled in a friendly way. “And where’s the IV?”

“Covering her, godmama,” Maxwell Lord the IV said cheerfully from his position further back in the rear. “Is this what you were looking for?”

“Oh yes!” Minerva pulled out a bow and a quiver of arrows, as well as a longspear. The former she slung over her back, the latter she grasped, and swinging around, she cut open the muskoxen fence enclosure. 

Now, the muskoxen drew back, visibly startled and worried, but Cheetah thrust one of her hands forward and spoke some words in an unknown language, and they stilled, now completely at peace and enthralled. 

“Lois Lane should better run now,” the Cheetah turned back around and spoke in a wry voice. 

“Excuse me,” Lois Lane began, but the Flash, who had had some experience with the Cheetah by now, just grabbed her and carried her away – just as the zoo’s muskoxen stampeded in their direction.

“Good luck in corralling them, whoever you really are,” Barbara Minerva told Superman as she began to walk in the opposite direction. “Thanks for the run-in – it was fun.”

“Minerva,” Diana began, (while failing to notice that the IV and his partner vanished in the mess)-

“Diana,” the other woman rolled her eyes. “I kind of feel that your magical lasso can come in handy in corralling the poor beasts.”

There was a pause. 

“You just can’t win this one,” Batman told Wonder Woman. “Let’s go, before someone gets hurt for real.”

“TOTALLY,” the Black Racer commented idly as he raced past them. “THE FLASH IS PRETTY FAST THOUGH-“ and he was gone.

With one last glare at Minerva’s retreating back, Diana followed Batman. Sometimes, it seemed, even superheroes had to take one for the team.

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Barbara and Clark, (who pretended to be Bruce Wayne), briefly hooked up in the DC 'American Alien" comic arc. This version of Catwoman is a blonde-, rather than a dark-haired woman, (as in TAS and Burton-verse).


	5. Cheetah vs. the Justice League - round 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Cheetah and the JL aren't gone with each other, not at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: see the previous chapters.

It all started quite peaceful, by Iceberg’s standards, as all of its’ patrons were minding their own business, and the Bat was elsewhere, probably on the JL business instead. Selina Kyle, aka the Catwoman, aka the Little Cat, (but only to a select few), was entertaining Barbara Minerva, aka the Cheetah, aka the Big Cat, (but only to an even fewer people), when she had to go to the little girls’ room, and Anatoly Knyazev, (aka the KGBeast), switched the TV channels in the lobby.

A live action concert from the next-door city (to Gotham) appeared on the screen, with some young woman, her hair dyed green, singing: “…and all the good girls go to Hell…” The song was not too good, and neither was the singer, but it was still unexpected to see the Cheetah get onto her feet, quickly pay her tab and begin to leave.

“Hey! Where are you going?” Harley Quinn, who planned to come over when the Joker was not looking, asked, disappointed.

The Cheetah just pointed to the TV screen. “Over there,” she said simply to Harley. 

“Why?” Harley could not help but to ask, (but then again, she was in a relation with the Joker for the moment, so it was possible that she really was just suicidal). 

“Oh, I’ll be killing her, this singing dumb-ass,” the Cheetah’s voice and vocal intonation did not change at all. “If your man is bored, tell him to wait a bit and not change the channel – there’s going to be carnage that he likes very soon.” She closed the doors of the Iceberg, and judging by the abruptly vanishing footsteps, she really put-on her infamous cheetah speed to get the job done quickly.

Abruptly, the Joker got onto his feet, his face unreadable, and his eyes – scary, (even more so than the normal). “Harley, I know what we’re going to do tonight!” he proclaimed, his voice bright and cheerful.

“What, Mr. J?” Harley asked, her own voice small – whenever the Joker was that dedicated, bad things happened, and not just to other people, but to Harley herself, (on a rather regular basis, cough). 

“We’re going to do our best to beat the Cheetah and see if cannot kill the singer ourselves!” the Joker literally crowed with laughter. It was not a very pleasant sound, or a very sane one, either. “Because I’ll be damned if I let such a bloody piece of a criminal chaos slip through our fingers!”

“And just how are you going to do that?” asked Bane, as he closed his cell phone. “Speed isn’t your thing, unlike the Cheetah’s-?”

“You’re wrong here,” apparently, Bane’s relatively reasonable tone of voice…did not set the Joker off prematurely, which was not too bad, given the circumstances, considering. “The Cheetah may have speed, but Harley and I? We got the Jokermobile! To the Joker cave, Harley!”

“Yes, Mr. J,” Harley said, (rather dejectedly), and the duo were gone. Without paying their tab. However, given the Joker’s mood, no one was going to be raising this issue anytime soon.

“Well, this is my cue to leave too,” Bane got onto his own feet. “I’ve been talking to Savage right now,” he elaborated to the others’ inquiring looks. “Both the Cheetah and I are a part of his social circle, if my English is correct, and he just explained to me as to what might’ve set her off. Now excuse me, I think I’ll try to do some damage control since no one else will.” Moreover, he too was gone.

“HE’S WRONG, YOU KNOW,” the Black Racer commented to no one in particular. “SELINA KYLE IS ALREADY GONE TO TALK AND MEET WITH MAXWELL THE 4TH ABOUT THIS SITUATION WHILE EVERYONE ELSE WAS DISTRACTED BY THE JOKER.” He paused, looked around, and shook his head. “AND EVERYONE IS IGNORING ME, AGAIN-“ He looked at the TV screen and almost whistled. “OK, THEY GOT A GOOD REASON – THIS TIME!”

…There was a good reason as to why the Black Racer almost whistled – the show that was unfolding on the TV was actually quite good…from a certain point of view. The Cheetah already crashed the concert, chasing after the singer and half-yelling and half-hissing “Die!” while swinging some sort of a flail around with a clearly lethal intent, herding the singer into a corner. She practically succeeded at that too, when the Justice League arrived, starting with the Flash, who snatched the singer and carried her out of harm’s way and out of the flail’s reach as well. 

“You’re safe now,” the Scarlet Speedster began to say when with a thundering noise the Jokermobile appeared on the scene. Harley was driving it, while the Joker was standing half-out of it, swinging some sort of a curved spear and shouting various things like “There she blows, the elusive green-black whale!” and “I’m Neji-sama!” while laughing maniacally. 

It was unknown who squealed louder – Flash or the singer, but the couple were gone in a proverbial flash. Sadly, the Joker and Harley noticed them already and were chasing them almost as quickly. 

“I cannot believe that the Joker still has that gas guzzler around,” the Penguin muttered crossly from his seat, even as he continued to have his meal.

“Excuse me?” someone asked politely. 

“Eh, a while back he tried to kill the real Batman to set himself up as the new Batman,” the Penguin muttered crossly. “Didn’t work out so well, Batman got the antidote, but he and the Joker managed to beat me up all the same. Do not ask. What’s happening at the concert?”

Back at the concert, Flash might’ve been gone, as well as the singer and the Joker and co., but the Cheetah remained, and Wonder Woman appeared on the scene as well, (both literally and metaphorically). She was not alone either – both Batman and Superman were flanking her.

Not that the Cheetah was alone either, as both Catwoman and the IV appeared next to her, (but Bane was not yet seen). The transmission was too jumbled for the words to be heard by now, (especially on the Iceberg’s TV), but Batman and Maxwell the IV exchanged some words… and apparently some of them were ‘Come at me, bro’, as the younger man did just that and kicked the Caped Crusader in the balls, hard enough for the latter to fold into two and head-butt the younger man – and then the two began to roll on the ground most unprofessionally.

Bane appeared, exchanged some words with Catwoman, shrugged, and professionally pinned the Caped Crusader without even breaking stride. Then he pulled the IV off and continued to talk about something, in that calm and reasonable way of his.

Superman was not amused. He shifted, his eyes already lighting up…when the Flash, still carrying the singer, swung past him, still running at a high speed. The Jokermobile was right behind him, but because its’ maneuverability wasn’t as good as the Flash’s, it rammed right into Superman…fast enough and hard enough to take both itself and the Man of Steel off-screen. Judging by the shout of rage that was almost visible even on the screen of the Iceberg’s TV.

Only Wonder Woman and the Cheetah remained standing by now – and they were talking to each other this entire time. By now, the transmission was so bad that no one could hear as to what had been said – but everyone could see when Wonder Woman shifted her stance and her grip on her sword and buckler, and when the Cheetah shifted her own grip on her flail, and the pair began to fight, with sparks flying from their weapons.

It was then that the transmission was cut, to everyone’s disappointment. “NAH, THEY ALL SURVIVE THIS,” the Black Racer commented, as he raced back into the Iceberg for another drink, (while not as fast as the Flash, he was still fast enough for this sort of thing). “PITY, ACTUALLY”. 

“Speak for yourself,” the Flash muttered, (he was without the singer by now). “We’re going to have a good rematch soon.”

The Black Racer just laughed in reply and the two speedsters were gone.

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Penguin talks about the episode from 'The Batman' cartoon series, done in early 2000s. By now, this series is forgotten, which is a pity, because it was quite good, actually.


	6. A math lesson of Dr. Minerva's.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once again, Zatanna is being babysat by Minerva, only the good doctor has some weird math in mind for the young magician...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I still don't own anyone here.

“Hello, Ms. Minerva!” Zatanna called out as she, however meekly, entered the abode of the older woman, only to be greeted by the woman in question as the latter all but slammed down her phone receiver and stared at Zatanna – or maybe starred through Zatanna – the young girl wasn’t entirely sure which one this was, entirely. She also wasn’t sure as to why she had looked Barbara directly in the eye – she wasn’t entirely sure that that was safe, given how Barbara Minerva wasn’t entirely human to begin with, and her reactions could be…unpredictable.

Yet it went down well – this time. Minerva inhaled, exhaled, shifted her body stance slightly and looked at Zatanna. “Hello, child,” she said slowly…and hairs rose along Zatanna’s back: maybe she was not out of the woods at all. “I see that your father has sent you here, while he and Circe are working on a surprise for you – an eventual surprise, but a surprise regardless.”

“Yes,” Zatanna said slowly, doing her best to sound submissive – she was beginning to suspect in earnest now that either had done something wrong, or something was wrong before she had arrived. “I guess that they are. What of it?”

“Nothing,” Minerva sat – or sank – down onto her chair, almost looking like some grand person sitting upon her throne, rather than anything else. “Zatanna, come here. I will tell you a fairy tale.”

“Yay?” Zatanna gulped as she slowly moved across the room, doing her best to keep some obsta-cles between the two of them – she had heard tales of the Cheetah by now, after all. 

“It’s going to be an animal fairy tale, because those are the oldest; some claim that they are the best, but we’re not going to be discussing this P.O.V.; rather, we will be talking about the apex predators vs the meek. Are you ready?”

“I’m listening,” Zatanna gingerly sat onto her own seat. “How does the story begin?”

“With math,” Barbara smiled. It was a friendly smile, just…not entirely human. “As you know, 1+1 equals 2; 1+2 equals 3. Correct?”

“Yes?”

“Yes, but only with numbers; with animals, it is different. Follow me.”

Minerva pointed in one direction; Zatanna looked, and Minerva continued to narrate:

“Once upon a time, in some northern forest, lived a weasel. It had a powerful body, like a rubber band the size of a sausage. Its’ jaws were full of sharp teeth. In addition, during winter, it was invisible, white on white snow. Only the end of its’ tail was black, but it didn’t matter: there’s black junk even on white winter snow.”

Zatanna kept quiet; Minerva continued to narrate:

“Not too far away from the weasel’s home lived a snowy owl. It was really big – its’ wide downy wings could cover an entire hare whole. And it was really strong – it could fly away with the aforementioned hare in its’ talons. Its’ beak was hooked, and so were its’ talons, four on each leg: two toes in front, two in the back. Only its’ head had a black spot on it – but it does not matter. Forget it.”

Zatanna gulped even as Minerva continued:

“And so, by this rate, we’re up to the number 2 already. However, if we wanted to do addition – say 1+1 – we would fail, for the owl and the weasel refused to be added up via food, or home, or whatever. They lived apart. They hunted separately. And if they met, the weasel would show off its terrible teeth, the owl would hook its’ beak, and both would be happy to go their separate paths.”

Zatanna gulped, as the picture of the two white, black, and red predators facing-off against each other on the white and grey snow appeared in her mind very, very vividly. In addition, Minerva continued:

“And not too far away from both of them lived a young snowshoe hare. It too was snow-white, save for the tips of its’ ears that were black. Now those tips must be remembered – they jump-started the entire process.

“The hare was a proper hare – a meek and an unassuming creature. During the day, it would find a spruce tree of an appropriate size and sleep beneath it. At night, it would go to the human set-tlements and steal some of their hay for nourishment. In addition, it was deathly afraid of beat-ing eaten by the weasel or the owl. So, what do we have now?”

“1+1 equals 2?” Zatanna suggested. “Only – not?”

“Absolutely not!” Minerva sniffed. “For how can we add when either the weasel or the owl are going to eat the hare up? This isn’t addition, it’s subtraction, so we should ignore it…only we’re talking real life here, when all sorts of things happen – and this is what happened.”

She paused. Zatanna adjusted her seat. Minerva continued:

“And so, one morning, the hare ran for its’ home. The latter had a stump with a snowcap upon it. The hare decided to sit behind it and listen if someone was in the neighbourhood, if it was safe to go home. More specifically, it sat behind the stump and began to twitch its’ ears.

“Immediately, the weasel from its’ shrub and the owl from its’ meadow saw the two aforementioned black spots twitching above the stump.”

“Um,” Zatanna began.

Minerva rolled her eyes. “Contrary to old wives’ tales, child, owls see just fine during the day. The point was that the weasel jumped into the snow and ran beneath it to the stump. In addition, the owl flew silently precisely over the snow, also towards that stump. However, the weasel reached the hare first and jumped upon its’ back!” Barbara’s hand shot out, making a grabbing motion. Zatanna gasped, but the good doctor continued:

“And the hare jumped into the air! And the owl grabbed it in mid-air!”

Zatanna gulped as she clearly imagined the entire picture in her mindscape.

“Only it didn’t. Rather, the owl grabbed the hare with one leg and the weasel with the other – there was no time to see just who was riding whom back then.”

Zatanna’s eyes bulged.

“And now we get back to math, as the two predators and one prey did add up mathematically, the entire 1+1 equals 2…but only for one brief moment. In the next, the weasel ditched the hare and bit down with all of its might into the owl’s throat. The owl too released the hare and grabbed the weasel with all of its talons!”

Zatanna grabbed the armrests of her chair; Minerva continued, her energy once more gone and her voice – almost a monotone.

“The hare fell back into the snow. The weasel tore open the owl’s throat. The owl broke the weasel’s back. Both died instantly. In addition, the hare fled deep into the woods. Take that, math – as you can see, here 1+2 equalled 1.” She paused and added, with a deep, bitter chuckle: 

“There was a reason as to why the weasel and the owl refused to be added together – 1+1 equaled 0 in their case, for all of the deceased, whether apex predators or not, always equal 0. Not even the meek hare is afraid of them anymore!”

Zatanna stiffened, as she imagined the scene with the dead owl and weasel in her mind; however, there was something else now – a hunter or a huntress emerged from the woods; maybe it was the Greek Artemis slash the Roman Diana, maybe not. She moved to the stump on her skis, leaned over the two corpses and breathed on them with a breath that wasn’t entirely human – and immediately the weasel and the owl jumped onto their feet…only they weren’t a weasel and an owl now, but rather a couple of humanoids…and Zatanna knew their new species – her father and Circe insisted that she learned them, what were the species' name…

Dimly, Zatanna was semi-aware of sliding from her seat, of someone catching her before she landed face-first on the floor, of someone – several someones – shouting at each other… and then she knew nothing more for a while.

She didn’t go to Dr. Minerva’s house for another long while either, but that was another story.

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone cares, this is me introducing the concept of the Rakshasas (from the Hindu mythology) into the DC world. They might be important further on in the story.


	7. Intermission: how the Flash met the Joker

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: DC still owns everyone here.

Flash, aka the Scarlet Speedster, was having some problems. Zoom, one of his current arch-enemies, had had him cornered, and that wasn’t a good thing – unlike some of his other foes, such as the Reverse Flash and the Mirror Master, who could be reasoned with, Zoom was much more nasty, and crazy, and right now, he had Flash cornered – and the rest of the JL members weren’t on the scene just yet…

“This is the end of the line for you,” Zoom was muttering meanwhile, sounding properly crazy and properly mean and looking…well, it was hard to say as to how he looked – he looked the same as always, with that featureless, colorless, grey suit of his. “There’s no ever after, no more threats for my kingdom in the future…”

“Ahem,” the Joker said conversationally, as he popped up seemingly out of nowhere. “You know, this is my place, my hideout that you people have trashed here.” He looked at the pair of speedsters and frowned. “Ah, yes, one of you is the Justice League’s Flash, so he’s off the hook, I suppose. Heroes do always trash the hideouts of us villains, that is what they do to be paid by the secret real estate cabal that is actually running the world… What is your excuse, Bucko?” he asked Zoom, narrowing his eyes and looking even crosser and crazier than how he usually did, (and Harley Quinn was nowhere in sight, FYI). 

“…Oh, it’s you,” Zoom muttered dismissively, while still maintaining his pin on the Flash, (out of the two racers, he was older and stronger, and it showed). “Did Mongol release you from entertaining his soldiers already?”

“That’s the right hurtful words,” the Joker did not back down, (though the Flash frowned: did he see the Black Racer also appear on the scene, or not?). “I mean, you’re the one who is starting it, though I am quite happy to finish this, Bullwinkle, old pal-“

“Excuse me? What did you call me?” Zoom released the Flash and faced the Joker directly. “What did the bleached sheet that you call a brain come up with?”

The Joker rolled his eyes. “And this is why he makes Bane look like Batman in the brains’ department,” he told the Flash instead. “You make your supervillain name to be ‘moose’ spelled backwards and then you get all huffy? Just come at me, bro, or are you a giant chicken instead-?”

Zoom moved as he could, slamming into the Joker and the two men vanished from the Scarlet Speedster’s sight. Of course, the latter was as fast as Zoom, and-

-and the Black Racer blocked him with his scythe.

“NO,” he said firmly.

“Whose side are you on?” the Scarlet Speedster snapped crossly.

“GOOD QUESTION,” the Black Racer admitted as he stepped aside. “THEY’RE OVER THERE, ACTUALLY.”

The Flash looked and saw the Joker get back into his line of view. “Well, that’s over now,” the Clown Prince of Crime, said conversationally as he dropped a bloody baseball bat away. “Wonder as to how the futuristic bastard will recover from this!”

“You know him?” the Flash could not help but to ask.

“Pal, you live long enough you’ll meet everyone who’s important and even some who are not,” the Joker replied dismissively. “So he was the self-proclaimed emperor of some future – big whoop! Futures come and futures go and vanish into the past, but the present is ours to shape – isn’t it right, old buddy?”

“DON’T CALL ME THAT,” the Black Racer replied as he prodded the still-prone Zoom with his scythe – the man did not move. “THE DOUCHE IS DOWN FOR THE COUNT THOUGH, SO YAY FOR YOU!”

“Stop, your enthusiasm is killing me,” the Joker said dryly. 

“ARE YOU SURE THAT IT IS MY ENTHUSIASM?” the avatar of the Grim Reaper shot back.

“Lovely guy,” the Joker sighed. “And why are you still here?”

“Mongol?” The Flash asked despite his better intentions and self-preservation skills.

“Once kidnapped me for me to entertain the morale of his soldiers with jokes,” the Joker grimaced. “I’m the Clown Prince of Crime, not some entertainer! Man, but do I hate aliens! At least the Kryptonian can be handled by some Kryptonite…”

“And where do you get it?” came the not-too-unexpected question.

“Here, in Gotham? From the Yakuza, actually,” the Joker muttered. “I won’t deny it – our fair city of Gotham is weird… Any other questions?”

“DO YOU LIKE THE NEW INLAY ON MY SCYTHE? THE DEER WOMAN GIVEN ME SOME OF HER SHED ANTLERS FOR IT IN ORDER TO ESCAPE WITH HER HIDE INTACT!”

The Joker opened his mouth, realized just which of the two speedsters asked the question and gave the Black Racer a look. “He just ran away to get the rest of the Justice League here?” he asked his own question instead.

“YES, SO YOU SHOULD GET OUT OF HERE,” the Black Racer shrugged, as he took-off with Zoom, (for his own purposes). “OR NOT-“

And the so the Joker did.

End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Deer Woman has made an appearance in the very first story of the series, remember?


	8. One of those weeks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And now for something different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: DC comics own everyone here.

...When Diana Prince slash Wonder Woman walked into the coffee shop and just sat down, ordering the shop's strongest expresso version, both Selena Kyle and her date knew that the JL had a tough time lately.

"Oh, absolutely," Wonder Woman agreed empatically, reading the facial expressions of both the young 'Catwoman' and her date, (the IV), loud and clear. "It's times like this that I miss having to face space threats!"

"What happened this time?" Selena asked politely, aware that her mentor wasn't around, and they didn't know how to handle WW on their own, (in a non-supervillain way anyhow).

"I've been working on a publicity stunt with a Senora Esperanza," WW confessed as she drank the expresso with all of the finesse of an African zebra drinking from the Nile river on the go, "she runs a musical company, one Normandy Shields, very cutting edge, very politically progressive. Lately, though, she in particular and her company in general began to be harassed, to get threats about the way her company is going in. So, Batman and I teamed out to investigate because reasons."

Selena and the IV exchanged looks with each other and beckoned to WW to continue, even as they paid for her next expresso. Diana ignored them and continued:

"So, we begin to investigate Normandy Shields - separately - and as a part of our strategy we have me do a publicity stunt with a bunch of innocent civilians to draw the would-be terrorist out."

"Would-be?" Selena couldn't help but to ask.

"Yes, because as even Joanna Lawton admitted, the person was a stalker, but there are some legal barriers between stalking and terrorism, unfortunately," Diana looked away. "Make no mistakes, children, your land of America is great, but for the love of Hera and Zeus, I've no idea as to how your laws work, somehow!"

Selena and the IV made sympathetic noises, and so did the Cheetah, even as she gave her supposed archenemy yet another espresso coffee. 

"No snarky comments?" Diana asked the blonde-haired metahuman.

Instead of verbally replying, the metahuman produced a small portable tablet and turned it on. It showed the Joker's current arrest in the Gotham city; the Clown prince of Crime was milking it to the max, hamming it to the 2000s; the fact that he had just killed commissioner Gordon's wife and crippled his daughter probably for life, leaving the man semi-desolate with grief didn't hurt, (the Joker, that is).

...On the other hand, even as the Joker was laughing into the sky, something, or someone, moved with all the grace and power of a mountain avalanche - Bane. Apparently, the man was also in Gotham, because of Lex Luthor's meddling, though the GCPD had arresed him - there were still handcuffs dangling off of his wrists. Since those were ordinary handcuffs, though, and Bane was Bane, they were more of a symbolic fashion statement than anything else.

Several cops were trailing behind Bane, rather reminiscent of remoras trailing a shark than of anything else, though one of them was an interpreter instead. (Bane's native language was Spanish, not English, after all). None of them tried to stop him when the man approached the Joker, grabbed him, lifted him off the ground, and began to speak, in Spanish, in an unexpectedly mild tone of voice. (The interpreter translated him, because Bane asked him - politely, and you don't get rude with Bane, unless you're in the JL, and sometimes not even then.

For her part, the Cheetah's tablet wasn't very good, sound-wise, but there were subtitles and all running on the bottom of the screen, and apparently Bane was explaining that the Joker's action had set-off a trip down the memory lane for him, for when Bane was young and still lived in his homeland, there were men like the Joker who did things like these ones to the women and found them funny, also. Bane didn't like that, he didn't find them funny, and so he grew up to be Bane and did something about it. Actually, he just got rid of those jokers, and as for the Joker himself...

Here Bane abruptly stopped his mild narrative and slammed the Joker hard, ass-first, into the ground, repeatedly. Judging by how the Clown Prine of Crime's legs jerked with each slam, those blows did some damage at the very least. And then, just as abruptly, Bane stopped, shook Joker by the shoulders more gently, and explained, that if he heard about the Joker continuing this sort of thing in the future, he'll be upset, come to Gotham, and do something regretful to the Joker, understood? He flicked the other man's nose - hard - and dropped him.

And then Bane abruptly left and went back to his police van to be extradicted from the U.S. - in theory. Batman then appeared on the scene, flanked by Mercy Graves of all people and explained that he couldn't interfere because he couldn't pry the woman in question off of his hands-

"He actually showd us at the JL Watchtover the bruises - he's not lying here," Diana said softly. "Also, it's actually a good thing that Mercy and Luthor have patched things up - Mercy is good for him now that she got some people in her corner."

"Anyone we know?" the younger couple piped-up.

"No, though they were coming and going through the wormhole that connects our universe and theirs for a while now," the Cheetah said brightly. "Maybe I'll even introduce you to them one day." She eyed Wonder Woman askance. "And what happened to you?"

"As I was saying, Batman and I were investigating Normandy Shields and discovered that their head of security, a Mr. Jeffrey Loeb, is actually behind them. Joanna Layton, who was my bodyguard - as a part of my cover-"

"What is she like?" the IV couldn't help but to ask. 

"A human version of Amanda Waller," Diana said flatly. "One that you can actually be friends with! She tried to apprehend Loeb as he tried to set off the final explosive, but failed, fortunately-"

"Fortunately?"

"As far as ordinary humans go, Jeffrey Loeb is an equivalent of an American badger, very ferocious, tenacious, and blood-thirsty," Wonder Woman said with a shudder. "Doesn't stop until he is down for good, and that can take some effort! Not surprisingly, then, that Esperanza decided to use him as her fall guy... and you aren't surrpised?"

"It's an old story," the IV shrugged. "See, her father, the old senor, used to do business with my father, before the entire Dreamstone misadventure, and almost destroyed him financially, so when Selena and I have heard about his daughter coming out and starting anew, using her father's old scam, I just knew that the Esperanza family was up to their old tricks, and so we tipped off Batman." He looked at Diana was a rather insecure smile and said, carefully: "Surprise?"

Wonder Woman just gave him a good long look. "Well, it worked out for the best," she finally said, though rather reluctantly. "Batman in particular was able both to reveal Esperanza's scheme to use Loeb as a scapegoat, and to stop Loeb and his dinosaur from killing Joanna."

"...Can you elaborate on the last part, please?" the Cheetah said carefully. "Did you say dinosaur? Are we talking about InGen's Dinosaurs-"

"Yes, and now that John Hammond's gone, it is going to be yet another mess, what with the government bombing the island into oblivion...but some dinosaurs survived and made it to the mainland all the same. Loeb was able to encounter and befriend one some time after, and it's a big one!"

"A raptor?"

"No, it's proper name is dilophosaurus, only it was about twice as big and strong as Hammond's brochures promised it would be," Wonder Woman pinched her nose, "and it follows Loeb's commands as a dog would. Considering that Loeb himself needs medication to keep himself coherent and sane, that's not entirely a good thing."

"Ah," the IV nodded sagely. "Esperanza?"

"Yes. Tried to sabotage Loeb's medical supplies and otherwise aggravate him to make him the fall guy for his scheme. She didn't know about his dinosaur, and she had underestimated him all the same..." Wonder Woman downed the rest of her latest coffee and looked through a window, briefly lost in her thoughts. "No damage was done, however, and Loeb even got his dinosaur to give Joanna a ride on its' back - now that he is getting some help at a medical facility in the Star city, he isn't really that bad..." she took another cup of coffee...only for the Flash to snatch it up and gulp it down.

"Hey, Diana!" he told the older superhero faux-brightly. "I am sorry to interrupt, but could you come with me to New Mexico? Cyborg and the others are already there, and there are plenty of new faces that you should meet!"

"Oh yes, absolutely," Barbara Minerva agreed, sounding weird herself. "Godson, Little Cat, we should get going too-"

"To New Mexico, godmama?" the IV asked politely.

"No, that's for Diana's side of the equation," Minerva cheerfully took her 'entourage' from the coffee shop, before either Wonder Woman or the Flash could react. "Oh!" she walked straight into the Black Racer at the exit.

"WANT ME TO GIVE YOU ALL A LIFT?" the latter said cheerfully, and the Cheetah, who wasn't actually as fast as the Black Racer was, agreed.

It was shaping to be one of those weeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any similarities to any events are purely coincedential; also, the dinosaur is taken from the original "Jurassic Park" novel, not the first movie.


End file.
